Aging and Dying

Sunday evening I attended an Evening Prayer/Funeral Vigil for Fr. John Atkinson. He was the priest of my adolescence and a key figure in my own faith development. He preached about peace and justice all the time. He also had the radical idea of calling our parish a community. We made a big deal of that, which was something in the Catholic church. When I went off to seminary he was the pastor of my home parish, but he was transferred the next year. Ironically, Fr. John planted a church a few miles from where I currently live, in Collierville, Tn. I remember coming out to see him. His misssion is now our biggest church in the town!

At the prayer service Sunday night, there was a couple from my first assignment. We shared pleasantries and the man said to me, "I remember a sermon you preached on Jeremiah..." He proceeded to quote lines from the sermon. He then asked, "How long ago was that?" I paused, did the math and told him, "27 years. I guess if people are going to remember them that long I need to work harder on my sermons!"

Actually, I already work hard on my sermons. Preaching and teaching are my primary focus in ministry. But I was surprised that people continued to carry words spoken so long ago close to heart. But then, I recall many things Fr. John told me 35 years ago.

One of the toughest parts of letting go of old friends is so much dies with them. My first days as a priest were spent with him. As his associate, I lived with him for two years. There are so many memories, many of them were only he and I. Seeing him in the coffin, I not only buried him but also the only person who could remember those days with me. The expression, "a part of me died with him" makes sense. That is part of the pain. I often say that there are few people left to verify my memories and offer evidence that I haven't made the story of my whole life up! Now there is one less.

The American culture is aging. We are transitioning into a society of older folks. The church is ahead of the curve, but it is universal to our entier society.The reality of aging and death are a challenge. The aches, pains and limitations are a huge challenge. It is also a chance to re-center; to realize that we are in need of refocus. The Lord is the King. He is the Center. There is still time for us to reconsider that. As I looked around the church Sunday night I saw many people whom I have not seen in decades. All of us were much older. The kids were adults. The young adults were gray haired and older. And the older folks, well they were not there because they are not here any more. Yet, in the midst of all those swirling memories, of happy-to-see-you-again-and-I forgot-how-much-I-missed-you reunions, and the pain of another loss, in the midst of all that shines the light of the Risen One. Our hope is in Him.