We have been assured that we will not have to do anything which we cannot do in good conscience as regards same-sex blessings. As efforts continue to normalize giving communion to unbaptized folks, I assume that we will receive the same warm assurance. Probably, that is supposed to make us feel all safe and secure.
The word, faith, also means trust. Saving faith, at some level, means saying "I trust God and only God." It means we do not trust ourselves to save ourselves. It means we do not trust others, either. In John's Gospel (2:24) we read that "Jesus did not trust Himself to them. He needed no testimony about people because He knew what was in all." No naive simpleton, Jesus knew the condition of the human heart. So my response to the Episcopal church leaders behind all of this "new thing" is this: words are cheap, put your promise into action. I want them to prove me wrong and actually act with Christian charity, acceptance and (the much ballyhooed) tolerance. I hope they show that I am being too negative when I say that I suspect in a few years there will be efforts made to cleanse the church of any and all Traditional believers.
Is the future bleak for those of us who 'cling to the old ways'? In the end, I am not sure that is the right question. It isn't for me, at least. I have always projected my future and am incapable of not thinking about the myriad factors shaping the days ahead. I also am accused of being negative. So, yes, I do feel the pull to worry about the future. I have a family to provide for literally (wife and three kids, including a baby) and figuratively (parish). But this morning I was e-mailing a parishioner and had a moment of insight. Like Clement (yesterday's blog) I found what I wrote for her was meant for myself because I am in the same arena!
She is one of many parishioners facing hard times. We have had several men die this year, so there are many new widows. There are also the folk with illnesses, some of them life threatening. Dementia is stealing away a couple others. There is nothing inherently Christian about the struggles and suffering they are enduring. Illness and death impact pagans as well. But there is something Christian about their responses. They turn to Jesus and His promises. They pray (even when it is hard) and they continue in the fellowship of believers. The try to do kindnesses to others, especially the poor and needy. They profess their faith, sometimes simply with tears.
As I wrote the e-mail this morning I found myself typing those words given to us by an anchorite mystic known as Julian of Norwich over 500 years ago. The words "all will be well" summarize the content of Hope. I have been doing theological reading on faith, works, grace, etc. It is odd (and confusing) to me that the people who most eloquently speak of grace and the sufficiency of God's actions are not at the forefront of trusting the chuch to God. How is it I am to believe God can save a sinner (a wretch like me) yet not believe that He can take our church where it needs to go? How is it grace alone and faith alone is their creed, yet I am told there is no hope in the church I attend? Like I said, I am very confused. I write in the hopes that others, confused like me, might find a companion for the journey. But confused as I am, I am grounded in many certainties. There are some things about which I am clear. One of those things is Jesus. His role and His commitment to us is my foundation. Based on that, I am also clear that 'all will be well.' Maybe not today, or tomorrow or next month. But some day.
I try to be a good husband and father. I work hard to be a good priest. I am a typical human being. I am full of all manner of sin and have been a major disappointment to God and myself. The failure pile seems to dwarf the the success pile on my life scales. I have not loved or served with the passion I should. And I repent. Daily, sometimes hourly. And I try to do what is right. And I try to love God and love others. And I repent. Daily, sometimes hourly. I do all this in the Epsicopal Church. [At least until they ask me to leave which they promise they won't!.] And I do it because I believe God is at work here, inspite of our best efforts to reject His revelation. I do it because I don't trust people to create a safe place for me, only God can and will. And He promised that if I (we) held on until the end we would be saved (healed)! So, while I disagree with much of what was decided at General Convention I refuse to lose hope. Jesus is still Lord and I am serving Him here.
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