Does God Exist 1

I had a communication today around this issue which made me think that this may be fertile ground for some reflections. My introduction to this will be a public confession: I have always struggled with faith.

Admitting such a thing is upsetting to some and consolation to others. I guess I hope only the latter group reads this! I think that my desire to be authentic is part of the problem. I want to make sure I am honest and so belief is something I self scrutinize. Also, as an educated person, I have been trained to probe and question everything. I try not to run away from difficult issues. In my job pain and crisis walk in the door on a regular basis. I have seen suffering first hand. So there is a theoretical and existential aspect to all this. I also don't want to be weak. I don't want to believe in God to cover over difficult challenges in my life. Finally, I am surrounded by unbelief. There are people who delight in challenging my faith. Their words find soft spots in my faith and weaken it.

Now, having said all this, I conclude with this. I do believe. I faced tragedy, pain and struggle in my own life and as a companion to others. I have analyzed and questioned and assessed the reasonable basis of faith. I can say that it is very reasonable to believe, even if I do not "feel" if sometimes. I have had experiences which make believing sensible. And most importantly, I have also investigated unbelief. If it is hard to believe in God, it is more difficult to be an atheist. Atheism has more holes in it then theism. So I can with integrity say the creed. I believe in Father God. I believe in Jesus. I believe in the Holy Spirit and the church. And I look forward to all things consumating in the Kingdom of God someday.... It makes me smile to write this! more next week